Are you a parent of adult kids? Are you an empty nester? If so, check out my article at Our Parenting Spot for strategies to create and maintain healthy relationships with your adult children:

In Search of Freedom

Have you ever noticed how we repeat the same patterns in our lives over and over again? We say to ourselves, “ I can’t believe this happened again!” and we look on as we find ourselves in the same relationship rut, embroiled in the same argument or duplicating the same situation in our career, our friendships or in our relationship to money. The specifics of these events may change however at some point, we finally notice that there are patterns that repeat themselves again and again and again.

At the point when we become sick and tired of the same old drama and trauma and when we become aware of these repetitive patterns in ourselves and know there must be a better way, we look for a solution to claim our freedom from this. We know that we want to act instead react and we become aware of the patterns that we recognize do not serve us anymore that stem from the wounds of our Inner Child.

We come to the realization that only we are responsible for healing this wounded Inner Child inside of us. These wounds are the places where our Inner Child has experienced trauma in the past.  These are raw and tender places and we often protect ourselves from venturing too close to them. We have covered them with layers of defenses so that no one can hurt us in the same way again.  We run from the truth of how we can heal these wounds instead of towards it because we are afraid that we will not survive. It is a natural response for us however there comes a time when we choose to act from a place of higher consciousness. We desperately want to release these fixed ways of reacting, not defining ourselves by them any longer, because we know, deep down, that our true Self is nothing like this.

We do not usually embrace this decision with leaps of joy and unbounded enthusiasm. Instead it looks to us like the lesser of two evils as we walk up to the edge and dip our toe in. This new decision is strange and scary, sometimes even terrifying, however we know it is pointing us to a place that needs to heal and we also intuitively know that this wounded area will dictate the choices in our lives unless we do. It will continue to nag at us and Life will bring us situations and people that give us the opportunity to heal, until we decide to.

This place is wonderful and terrifying and exhilarating and strange. It beckons us to make a new choice as we take a new road to venture onto this unfamiliar territory called Conscious Choice. It calls us to take control of our actions, our words and our thoughts instead of falling into the seductive allure of familiarity and complacency.

With this new realization and this new awareness, we choose to act from love for ourselves and others instead of from a defensive standpoint. We now choose to see those in our lives in a new light, one bathed in compassion and acceptance. We decide to look at the patterns in our lives with honesty and clarity, instead of fear. The wounds of our Inner Child do not cause us this intense fear anymore because we now know only we are in charge of how we feel and what we do. When we now notice those repetitive situations, we choose to make choices based in freedom and strength that honor who we truly are.  

This new awareness and new choice gives us the strength, stability and freedom that we ultimately seek. It serves to affect others in our lives as well, as our traditional reactions have now shifted. Those we come into contact with notice and respond to this new energy as it helps to heal us and to heal them at the same time.

In this place, we find the freedom we have been searching for as the past no longer dictates our present lives. 

A Tool For Manifesting

Visualization is an amazing tool that can speed up the manifestation of what we desire in our lives. Often, when we want something to occur, we find ourselves in a place of wishing, hoping, and wanting. This energetic frequency is actually coming from a place of lack and will only keep what we want at a distance.

When we use the tool of visualization, we will utilize all of our senses as we envision the experience we are seeking to create. We focus our emotions on how we would feel if it manifested. 

Here are the steps:

First, identity what it is you desire. Make it specific however, don't be attached to the how or the when.

What do you want and why do you want it? How will it make you feel when you get it?
What experiences will you have? How will it change you life? What would you see, feel, or hear? 

Now, write out an affirmation that describes your goal in the present tense, beginning with the words I AM. I AM is a powerful phrase that is the starting point of creation. For example, I AM in perfect health. I AM full of gratitude that all of the cells in my body are perfectly healthy and full of vitality and energy. I AM able to live my life with joy, purpose, and gratitude. 

Next, spend several minutes envisioning you new reality. Picture your surroundings. Who would you be with and where would you would live? What would your day be like? How would your mornings begin and what are the experiences that you would expect? Have fun with this and spend several minutes feeling the feelings in your body, envisioning the tastes, sounds, and sights and fill your body with the emotions you would experience on a regular basis living the life of your dreams!

Plan to spend 10 minutes or more visualizing your dream life three times daily, preferably morning, afternoon, and evening. Get lost in the feelings, sights, and sounds. Enjoy the experience and infuse it with as much emotion as you can. 

It took me a while to realize that the Universe does not care about what we want or why we want it. It truly is an impartial, fair, and predictable system that responds to the energy we exude. It does not matter if we work hard or have desired these changes in our life for a long time. The Universe will only bring forth experiences aligned to what is in our vibration. The energetic states of trying hard, working hard, desperately wanting, constantly sacrificing, begging for something to change, or feeling unnoticed, disappointed, and resentful only serves to keep our desires just out of our reach. 

We are in charge of our vibration, if we choose to take the responsibility and the control. Have fun with this exercise and make a commitment to practice it daily. Look forward to the manifestation of your dreams with positive expectation, appreciation, and gratitude!